As the minutes wear on you stare at me
With dead fish eyes and a sugar-spun heart,
From the ocean floor where seaweed takes your hair
To make it's bed, and bubbles of lost words escape
Your lips, to make a soundless 'I love you',
Without moving.
Ebbing water softens your pain, washing away your
Shards of broken heart, melting into pearls that I will
Wear around my neck to say 'I did this'.
Time takes away your flesh, revealing empty cavities
I had once thought were full - and gape at me
With wordless tongues.
When my eyes rise to the light, you sink into
Darkness: dappled light on green-tinged skin once yours,
That I wear like a suit of armour. You are left
Where the fishes are your only friends,
Lurking where your heart should be,
With eyes that will not shut.
















Comments
however, i believe you could find substitutes for quasi-cliche terms like 'as the minutes wear on', 'shards of broken heart', and 'suit of armor'. for example, the portion on green-tinged skin and armor could be minimized into a coat of algae that the fish nibble on.
keep writing
cheers (:
--
let's go play on a baggage carousel
And I will
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(¸.·´ (¸.·`¤~poetry is everything~¤
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